To: My Husband To Be

Lauren - St. Louis, Missouri
Entered on December 18, 2008
Age Group: Under 18
Themes: love, work

While some women groan about their husbands barking orders at them constantly – if only I had a husband – I’d adore it. Honestly, I would love to be told what to do by a true man.

Growing up in a Christian atmosphere, I was taught “don’t have sex, instead stay pure, until you’re married.” Oddly enough, those teachings made me crave everything more. I want to be pregnant more than anyone I’ve ever met. I want those nine months to be the most real I’ve ever had. I want a husband. And I want my husband to tell me what to do. I want him to tell me to go to the store, the agenda for our day, and for him to own me, entirely.

I’ve heard my friends say, “I’m a woman and I’m independent! I don’t need a guy telling me what to do.” But I believe I do. I believe in the very design of who a man and who a woman should be together and their roles together. I would adore nothing more than to submit to my future husband and say “yes,” always. I’ll get more milk if he wants it, double laundry if necessary, and I’ll do the dishes if he’s too tired. Anything he asks, I want to do. I want to be overtaken by a man and be under the umbrella of his body, mind, and spirit.

I know my future husband will follow God first and foremost and through that will consider my thoughts, feelings, and needs. This way, I can trust whatever he wants me to do will be God-honoring and God-following.

Even when we’ll fight, everything will be okay. When he yells and I begin to cry, instead of running out the door to cool off, I want to run to him and cry into his chest. I would love that the very person I’m crying about is the person that can make it alright. I trust that as my husband, he would grasp my shaking hands and hold me. He’ll be my leader, husband, friend, and my human-owner. As his woman, I will be his wife, friend, mother to all of our children, his fragile flower, and his other half.

I’m not an independent woman and I never can be. I refuse to deny the very person I am meant to be. I believe the role of a man and the role of a woman fits together in a painting of perfect unity, beauty, and happiness. To my very core, I crave relationships and crave to be told what to do, by a man. The raw power, structure, and mind of a true man is breathtaking; completely unique. Just as there is nothing on earth more inspiring then a true woman who is fragile, sensitive, and loving.

I am in awe of the intricate design of the roles for both genders; my heart tells me someday I will be a part of one of these masterpiece paintings.