This I believe.
I believe in being real. I used to walk around wearing the mask of a fake person. This person was not me. My closest friends started to see right through me, finding out lies and finding out what I would say about them when there where not around just to fit in. and then they were no longer there.
Throughout middle school I didn’t know who I was nor did I know who I wanted to be. All I knew was what I had to do to make me fit in the “in crowd”. I would talk about my close friends and I would never expect them to find out. I was not an attractive girl, chubby short, acne, yeah that was me. I felt unwanted, so I though by making the choices that I made would make me cool. The wrong ones.
My friends confined in me to keep the secrets, to be there when they needed me most, and I went behind their backs and I would run my mouth, to my “other” best friend. Then I was found out I had been unmasked and underneath was a person I thought I would never know or ever want to meet, I was what I hated. I was ugly on the inside. Then my closest friends all walked out on me as one walked in. Kaitlyn the best friend you could ask for stayed by my side to help me through this outbreak.
That’s when it hit me, people who are worth being your friend are the one that except you no matter what. They like you for you, not who you pretend to be. It hit me that talking bad about someone will not make you any better and it will not make you look better. I realized that the people who gossip about all there friends, are the ones who are not happy with them self. And that is not who I wanted to be. I wanted to be happy; I just wanted to be me.
Dead weight got lifted off of my shoulders. Its okay to be me, I was tired of hiding and I was tired if the problems I brought upon myself. I have gained a lot of friends and lost few, looking back I don’t know who I thought that I had to be, when the only person I wanted to be was me. I threw off that body suit of imitation and took a deep breath, ready to walk the school halls as me. Today I am no one else and I feel no need to be. Now I have few enemies and even fewer regrets. This I believe…be real.
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