I suffer from depression. It is a disease that has plagued my family for generations. Countless take medications and some have even gone to the extent of attempting suicide. For me, I refuse to receive help from pills or other drugs; I beat it with my own strength of mind and character. I know that tomorrow brings new day to be happy and move on. Happiness is a choice and I have to choose to let things go and not let depression weight me down. I owe this mentality to my aunt. It is through the tremendous story of her struggles that I’ve been able to move forward through the toughest of times. I earnestly believe that life does goes on.
My aunt is a hero in every sense of the word. She suffers from depression and has seen more tragedy and disappointment in one lifetime than anyone I know. Her will has been tested to an extent of which I cannot even fathom. It all began with the death of her first two sons shortly after their birth. My aunt was never once able to hold one of them in her loving arms and give them their first kiss or call them baby. Not even one year later, she awoke one morning to find her husband hanging from a noose in her family barn. I still see the tears. I still hear the cries. It is an event forever etched in my mind. I still hear her daughter asking, “Where’s daddy?”, “When is daddy coming home?” Imagine telling a four year old daughter that daddy isn’t coming home and years later telling her what really happened to him. I saw a family torn apart from the very roots of which held it together. It was a struggle I cannot fully understand and a battle I did not wish to fight. A few years later, she married again. Again just one year later, she was alone. Her husband had left her for his ex-wife. To top it off she no longer can pay any of her mortgages and she is losing just about every house she owns. At a point where most would give up, she kept on living.
I really can’t image the pain and despair that my aunt has felt over the years. Her faith and sanity must have been pushed to the very brink of its existence; yet she still smiles; she still laughs. It is amazing that through as dark of times as my aunt has seen, she can still find the light in life. I admire her courage and will to move forward with every step she takes. I admire her perseverance with every day she wakes. My aunt has taught me so much about the day to day fight with depression and life’s, sometimes, seemingly endless struggles without ever speaking a word. However, what is most important about my aunt’s story is I can now see that tomorrow truly is a new day.
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