I believe in me

jamie - alpine, Utah
Entered on December 12, 2008

I Believe In Me

Three years ago I had one dream and that dream was to a basketball team. So I decided in order to be good enough I would play basketball everyday and do everything I could to get better. I was conditioning myself, working on shooting, ball handling, lifting weights, everything. Try outs came and I did not even walk in the gym, I just stood out side of the door.

At that time when people asked me why I was not there I made up some lame excuse or say something about a family emergency. Three months later I was playing in a pick up game and injured my knee. Since then I have always blamed the reason I did not try out on that injury. If only people knew those tryouts were in November of 2005 and I injured my knee in February of 2006. I have never told anyone the real reason I did not try out until now, and that reason was because I did not believe in myself.

For the last three years this has tormented me. Always asking what if, and trying to understand why I did this to myself. Since then I have been selling myself short. Not expecting the best, because I believed that I could not give it. This idea transferred to all areas of my life, school, work, and relationships. If only I knew then, the things I know now.

During this summer I came across a quote that really made me think The quote actually came from a Gilbert Arenas add for Adidas where he said, “If no one believes in you, then believe in yourself”. It made me think, “If I don’t believe in myself, who does?” I really did not think that not trying out for the basketball team was a big impact on my life, but I let it become one when the idea of not believing spread into all areas of my life. I know that if I knew what I know now, what I knew then, I could have been a better me with that self-confidence.

Because I came across this quote it has taught me many things. It has taught me not to fear failure. It has taught me that my opinion about myself is that only one that truly matters. It has helped me break out of my shell more and be the person I want to be without worrying what other people will think. It has taught me to be there for myself when I need myself to overcome a big task. Although I had questioned if I really could have made the team I believe that I could have. Because of what I believe it has helped me get over my past and start bigger and better things. Now not only am I succeeding at what I want to but I am letting my self succeed by taking that first step. I believe in me.