Performing

Karma - IDAHO FALLS, Idaho
Entered on December 12, 2008

I’m moving to the music, flipping to the beat, and counting the entire time. I can feel the eyes of the crowd watching and waiting for the next big stunt to come in the routine. I depend on nineteen other girls to hit every motion and on the right count. The entire time I’m performing I think of the exhilaration I’m feeling. I believe in performing. I believe in performing the routines I have perfected through all of my hard work and dedication. I believe in performing even though my greatest fear is messing up. Performing that routine is when it all pays off.

I woke up five days a week to go to practice at Rigby High School. The feeling of complete dread would fill me and I had to fight it off knowing that I was about to run the mile and then commence in a two hour workout to perfect a routine. Dailey I wanted to walk out so all the pressure would simply melt away. But I always knew my hard work would be worth it in the end when I performed the routine. I believe in performing the routines I worked so hard for during practices.

The fear of messing up has haunted me my entire life. My love of performing a dance routine was great, but the fear of falling or forgetting even one step is terrifying. And I did just that; I forgot just one move. We were performing at the biggest game of the year, and I had just missed a step. I saw a man laughing in the crowd and suddenly I thought it was me he was laughing at. My body almost froze but something pushed me on. I kept moving my arms, but just barely. My legs were shaking and threatening to let me fall to the ground in a heap. My eyes did not hold a spark of excitement but instead they held in a waterfall, just daring me to break the dam. When that one performance finally came to a close, I already knew I would be back out there next time so I could prove to myself that I can do it. And even though my biggest fear came true, I know I still believe in performing.

I believe in performing even though there is hard work involved and I fear messing up. For five years I dedicated myself to dancing, tumbling, and stunting. I put my body through rigorous workouts and my mind through stress filled days. Knowing every time that I went out on that floor it was because I believed in the feeling I got from performing. Performing completes who I have become while growing up.