I believe the presence is a present. Each day is a new chapter in my life, and each day I think I know how the next chapter goes, I don’t. But life’s funny that way, once I let go of the wheel, I might just end up where I belong. I learned to find peace from accepting that it’s alright to not know what’s going to happen next, and I learned to live and appreciate the presence for I don’t know what the next chapter’s going to be about.
My parents did not tell me we were permanently leaving my country to move to America. “We’re going on a far away vacation,” they told me, and I believed them. My dad had an important job in the government and the communist government denied his request to relocate my family to America. My parents kept the relocation a secret because they feared that if the words got out, my dad would have been sent to jail. With the help of friends within the government, my family successfully landed in America July 2000. Looking back, I didn’t get to properly say goodbye to my dad’s side of the family. I did not understand why my grandmother cry if we were to return from the trip within eight days, well those eight days have turned into eight years, I have not seen her since.
I now understand why the presence is a present. It’s a present because I am here now; I am surrounded by people who care for me, people who mean the world to me. Although I would do anything to see my dad’s family again, I refuse to use up my presence being sad about what happened in the past, and take my presence for granted. I now cherish every moment of my presence as it is a present because I’m unable to know what’s going to happen tomorrow, but one thing I’ll know for sure is if tomorrow’s totally unexpected, I would have at least contently spent today and my presence to my fullest. I believe in the presence, this moment in my life where not everything is perfect but everything feels so right.
(I wrote 365 words, one word per day I live contently in a year)
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