I believe that problems in life can’t be conquered, but are just recurring. Life has always been like that and always will be, at least for me it will. You can never be rid of a problem, but just put it away for a little while an come back to it later. My belief in this came when my parents seperated early last school year. It was devastating for everybody. Even my two dogs were affected because they couldn’t see my dad anymore, or just barely once a month. After a few months of trying to live with one parent at a time, I was the kid who wore their hair over their eyes and who wore all black. I was the kid who was super depressed and had lost all hope in life. It even got to the point where I tried to hurt myself. The smile on my face every day was a hoax, and i thought life couldn’t get any worse. I was wrong. My mom and dad acted like two wolverines fighting for one tiny canary, and it was total hell. They still act like that off and on; the problem is just set aside until one of the sets off about a different thing.
Problems aren’t like a lollipop, where you can just get through the whole thing and be done with them. Problems are more like seasons, constantly changing and going away for a while, but they always come back. At first, my way of dealing with my parent’s divorce was just to cry all night and hide it the next day. Over time, I realized that i had a knack for writing poetry. I started to really work at it and eventually, that’s what replaced crying. Now, I try to write at least a few poems a night, or at least 10 a week. It seems that every time my parents have a major conflict is when i write the most, and that works out to be once or twice a month. I thought that after the divorce was reaching the end that they would stop. I was horribly mistaken. The fighting never ceases, not with them. It’s a constant war, but there can be no winner. No problem is over with. Ever.
If you enjoyed this essay, please consider making a tax-deductible contribution to This I Believe, Inc.