It is ironic how one of life’s experiences can impact your beliefs and how you view the world. One of my greatest beliefs is based on an unplanned event that turned out to be one of the best decisions in my life. My belief is that you can make a bad or difficult situation into a good or productive situation.
When I was 19 years old I became unexpectedly pregnant. I knew I would not be able to provide financially or emotionally to the extent of what this baby deserved. After much debate and soul searching I reached the difficult decision to give this wonderful gift of life up for adoption.
With the help of an adoption agency I immediately fell in love with a young couple not able to conceive a child of their own. There was no doubt in my mind this was the mom and dad my child needed.
On a bitter cold January night I gave birth to a healthy, beautiful baby girl. That night as I held her tiny, fragile body knowing this may be the last time, tears engulfed my face. As my heart began to ache, I began reminding myself she was going to have a good happy life. The next day I put on a brave Fay sod even though inside my heart was crushing. The memory of saying my last goodbye and handing my baby to her new overjoyed family is still imprinted in my mind.
Both joy and sorrow filled that hospital room that day as they took Emily home.
Throughout the years I remained in contact with Emily and her new family. I never regretted my decision, although I did in some strange way miss her, even though I never really got to know her. I often think about the option of a new life I was able to provide for my first born child in addition to the formation of a strong blissful family.
Today Emily is happy healthy well adjusted 16 year old thanks to her mom and dad. I am grateful for all the love, support and encouragement they have given our precious child. I will for always be indebted to them. No words can ever express my gratitude.
I visit with her often. Visits with her remind me there is always another solution, a way to make a difficult decision into a good decision. This is a philosophy I embrace in my everyday life and have transferred this belief down to my 4 children which has been of great benefit.
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