The Bigger Person

Seth - Deshler, Ohio
Entered on November 21, 2008
Age Group: 18 - 30
Themes: forgiveness

The Bigger Person

I was at time in my life when I was young enough to only be concerned in my own petty debts and hanging out with my friends, but my father was worrying how recent events were going to affect us kids. Our neighbor, who has been a friend of my father’s for years, was getting greedy and trying to build a mega farm and trucking company. Through a complicated situation our neighbor went into millions of dollars in debt to not only the bank but to several local friends in which he had been borrowing from, in promise of repayment. Among these debts was my father and the amount of this debt was life changing in my views.

One day a rumor started that our neighbor was filing bankruptcy. Not only did this rumor turn out to be true, but it did so within hours. Because the bank note was the most outstanding debt they seized all the property owned by the corporation and sold all the assets to cover their debt. Having seen this coming our neighbor had transferred the names on the titles to his family members so he would not lose everything. After all of his friends realized that he had left them high and dry, with no apology, they cut off connections with him. This hostility still remains today in most of the people affected by his actions, but about a year after the bankruptcy, my father started communications with our neighbor just to be friends again. To this day my father frequently gives our neighbor work and also helps when he needs it. Through the years of this relationship I understand the importance of the lesson learned from this situation and being able to forgive someone for such a wrong doing. This stands out in my mind of the kind of person I believe all people should try to be.

I believe that everyone’s life is based on not just big beliefs but in many small beliefs. To me the values of each of my beliefs change, or are emphasized upon, every time they are challenged. One of my more important and most recent beliefs that were tested was my belief of forgiveness. Now to understand where this belief came from and how it was instilled in me someone would simply have had to live my life. Being a growing child and trying to think independently I didn’t want to try at such a thing as forgiveness; to me that seemed to show weakness. I began realizing its importance when I had wronged someone and sought their forgiveness. I have found it easier to forgive those trespasses against me but find it a little more difficult to do the same for those trespasses against my friends and family. Feeling the mental stress of forgiveness I have learned that it is easier to get it off my conscious. I believe no matter what, even if some things take longer to get over than others it is important to forgive. Instead of holding prejudice for past events, we should learn how not to be wronged in the same manner. Even though it feels bad to be taken advantage of, it feels worse to hold a grudge against someone.