Am I just a late bloomer?

jefferson - Fort Collins, Colorado
Entered on November 4, 2008
Age Group: Under 18

I believe in optimism.

I believe that being ridiculously optimistic can be good. I so far have been lucky enough to never have anything bad happen to me. I had no way of knowing how to deal with anything bad. I have never even had a pet die.

So with that I never had any reason to need even think about how I would. Unfortunately this gave me a pessimistic look on life because having never truly having a hard time my view of a hard life was the classic rich brat view on life wanting more. I never tried hard at school or anything that didn’t interest me. I don’t know how it happened but one day I realized how good I had it and how I surrounded myself with a pessimistic view on life. Not just the big things either but I realized how I was around constant ridiculous complaining and it gave me an idea. If I have pessimistic about everything what if I try to be not just optimistic but ridiculously optimistic like that book “Pollyanna” which ironically is one of the worst books I have ever had to read in my life nevertheless it’s the thought that counts right? Well I decided to start with the thing I had hated most, school. The first class I had was none other than the living hell known as math. Sitting in a room full of kids who were supposed to be in that class but I should have been in a higher class but I never bothered to do anything I was assigned. So there I was sitting on b- grade in a class too easy for me with no intentions on trying. But one day Instead of just staring at the clock for 80 minutes I decided to pay attention and actually learn and try to enjoy it. That was a little too ambitious but one week after that I got moved up into the class that I actually had to try in. I began to try to enjoy every class I was in or at least as best I could but this made my grades better and the school day more much more bearable.

I now try to be optimistic with everything I do. But I have accepted that doing school work will never be what I want to do but it’s a lot easier when for me to try to be positive.