There was a time in my life not too long ago when I was completely lost. I found myself coming of age, still lacking any sense of bearing or any sort of identity. More than anything I wanted something that I could give my life to—the need to be significant, to make a difference, was consuming me. The person looking back at me in the mirror was not the individual I sought to be. In all actuality, it was as if I was the one starring back out, instead of into, the mirror. Through suffering turmoil of the rite of passage into manhood, I realized God’s presence in my life for the first time.
I can recall the exact moment of my salvation, when I opened up and accepted Christ as my Lord and Savior. The rains I had prayed for brought about winds of change. As the clouds shifted and the skies cleared, my shadow fell upon my futile ways as if to form a line behind me marking the past as a symbol of a new beginning. The sun had set upon my face for what seemed like the first time ever in my life, and I was captivated by God’s majesty, grace, mercy, and His love. All at once, I was made aware time would not stand still for me; in my heart I knew if nothing was ventured, nothing would be gained. As I stood there preparing to part ways with my old self, I let the winds run through my hands. I had no faith before that day in any vow or deed. Today, I live my life knowing that God knows my name and everything I have ever done and will do, and that He wants to forgive me.
I did not turn to religion as a coping mechanism, or for an easy solution to my problems; God was moving in my heart all along to bring me back to Him. My senior year of high school I met and befriended a born-again Christian who acted as Lord’s vessel in my life. She showed me that God has a plan, a purpose, for each of us. What is more, I became conscious of the fact that His plans cannot be frustrated. Although I am not certain on the exact nature of God’s calling for me just yet, I have learned to trust faithfully that He will guide me. When God calls, He enables.
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