Marriage for practical reasons instead of love

angie - Grand Rapids, Michigan
Entered on November 3, 2008
Age Group: 18 - 30

I’m going to be married in two months and I’m not in love with my future husband. I am marrying him for financial stability and he is marrying me for companionship. I believe this is the way to go when it comes to marriage.

I always hear people talking about this “fairytale” love. You know the one, where everything is perfect and life is great. I was one of those people and then I grew up. The way people get married and then divorced within five years, who wants that? Not me. I feel like everyone is always getting married for lust and not for love anyway, so why not get married for reasons more practical, like financial stability.

My soon to be husband and I dated almost three years ago. He joined the army and we remained close friends. I would always tease him about us getting married so he could take care of me and have a hot wife. We are comfortable with each other because we have been friends for awhile and we both understand that we are not in “love”. We also know that we care about one another and support each other.

I’m in school full time and I have a son, so most of my time is spent with him and my studies. I have chosen not to work. I feel like if I were to work I would miss out on spending time with my son. Being there for my son is number one in my life. When my future husband and I marry, he will benefit from a pay raise and that will save me from having to get a part time job. My son and I will also have health insurance. My husband will benefit from having his house work done, his meals cooked, and the freedom to go away when he needs to. I will always be there awaiting his return, to support him and to be there when he needs me.

We are not going in to this marriage looking or expecting to find other people. Even though we are not in “love” one or both of us may find someone we are interested in. Since we are close friends we are able to talk to each other about these things. He and I have always been open about our relationships and have given each other advice, without all the jealousy.

What is a marriage certificate but a piece of paper? A wedding is only an excuse for women to dress up like a princess and to have a big party. My grandma always told me, “Marriage is hard work and you have to work at it every day.” You get out of it, what you put into it. I don’t claim to have it all figured out. Who knows we just might fall in “love.” What starts out to be practical, convenient, and beneficial, may turn out to be a long-lasting, beautiful relationship. This is what I believe.