Growing Pains

Summer - Church Hill, Tennessee
Entered on October 26, 2008

I believe that nothing in this universe happens by accident. That every moment in our life has meaning, no matter how small it seems. Whether we are consciously aware or not, we are continually in an unceasing evolution of self. I believe that every experience we encounter; the pain, the joy, the laughter, the tears, the unspeakable sorrow and the indescribable happiness all have purpose. The beauty of life is to be able to feel these things and learn from them. There is a passage in an incredible book that says, “feeling is the language of the soul.“ There are an infinite number of emotions, each one a reminder of the depth of our souls. Every heartache shows us that we are that much stronger to hold our head high again and take steps forward to move on; and every blissful moment is a reminder of why we keep moving forward.

There are days in my life that I honestly think to myself “How much longer can I go on like this? How much can one person endure?“ These are days when life seems to be an unending struggle and disappointment. Days when the only thing I want to do is crawl into bed and sleep until it is all over, days when death is viewed as a beautiful release, and there is no more pain, no more tears or broken hearts. I wish that I could say these days are few and far between, unfortunately they are not. My only comfort in these long lonely miserable days is knowing that each moment I am showing myself and the world just how strong I can be and that someday times like these wont be so numerous. I chose to face each day with determination that I will make it to the next.

I believe that our purpose in this existence is to experientially know who we are and express that outwardly at all times, to grow and know the true meaning of unconditional love and then to express this and send it out into the world upon others. Each moment is a new creation, an opportunity to be and decide who you are at all times. Many people look to their past and regret things they have done. I believe in looking to your future. If you have chosen to act in a way that you feel does not represent your highest self take this moment now and actively decide to make a new choice. Love who you chose to be.

Some believe that there is no afterlife, that we simply cease to exist. I have no intention of judging these beliefs, but how disappointing would it be if all our experiences and how much we have grown as creative beings ended with a physical death? I believe that every event in our lives, every person that touches us has been to give us the opportunity for spiritual growth; and I believe we each have a purpose. Nothing happens by accident.