power of confession

Chris - 80228, Colorado
Entered on October 25, 2008

The Power of Confession

I believe in the power of confession. My vicious cycle with drug addiction and jail has broken me. Repeating this cycle for five years has humbled me to the point where I had to confess my wrongs. Something inside told me that I had to surrender myself in order to have a new start. So I attended church, rehab, and read many books. In these attempts to change is where I experience hope from honestly and confession.

I’m safe for now inside these walls. I don’t want to be here but in truth it’s the best place for me. This is where healing takes places if I make the effort. It is here where I found myself, and God. It is here where I can stay sober just long enough to work on the damage I have caused. Jefferson County Jail, where I have spent close to 28 months of my adult life in. Not only did I find myself here, I also found myself with more charges. I knew my life was only going to get more difficult as I progressed in my addiction. My drug usage was getting deeper, the crimes where more frequent, and the sentences for the crimes where starting to stretch into multiple of years. I knew the way I was living was wrong; but I lost all will power. This is not how people are supposed to live. On top of that I was in denial, blaming, accusing the world for what was going wrong with me. I was heavily addicted and the drug had warped my mind, spirit, and soul. As soon as I was able to be honest and confess that I needed help; and admitted I could not escape this lifestyle; I then was open for change, the miracle. So I prayed to my higher power who found me. It is his presence I felt all around me in that cold cell at the end of the hall in jail. Having had a spiritual awaking, I knew this was my calling, my chance and I asked to show me a new way of life.

This new life was given to me by the grace of God. Slowly my negative perspective and bleak view on life started fading away. From admitting that I was weak and powerless; and actually surrendering, I then felt lifted, cleansed and more optimistic towards my future. I some how knew in order for me to move on after this revelation I had to think, act, and behave differently. So I read many books, and after taking that information, I used it to transform my deep beliefs.

One of the most powerful tools that helped me stay close to God and in touch with myself in recovery was and is confession. When ever I feel myself backsliding and falling back in to old habits I humble myself and admit wrong. See with confession I can admit that I was wrong, that I have made a mistake. I can see it for what it is; with confession denial is wiped away. With confession I am able to take responsibility for my wrongs. New insight is brought to my attention; with this insight I am able to act and behave in healthy ways. With confession those nasty feeling inside are losing there grip. I feel free again not to punish myself anymore. I see myself and the world in a new light. These are the change the power of confession has had on me. Today I am clean,and living a brand new life.. The drug that has taken millions of people from all walks of life is meth. I pray that this may touch someone and inspire you to seek forgiveness through confession.