Sometimes there are things in life that will come to make us strong. Everyday God grants us life but when it is taken away, we become miserable and do not know what to believe anymore. Although life is tough, you must believe that you will make it through.
I loved my father dearly with all of my heart. I was daddy’s little girl and I looked up to him. There were times where we would sneak and play jokes on my mother just to make her mad. We use to watch wrestling every Monday night, it was like a tradition. Every time my mother made me cry, I would run to him and he would dry my eyes and tell me, “Everything is going to be okay”. Running to his arms was my escape from life. He protected and shielded me from all harm that came my way. At times I took his love for granted and I never got to tell him thank you or I love you.
One night, I was on the computer playing a game when my mother came to me with a disturbed facial expression. I got a feeling that something was wrong and she told me, “Come and sit with me, I have something to tell you”. I said, “No!! What is wrong? Does it have something to do with daddy?” She could barely speak her eyes were choked up with tears and she nodded her head. She patted my back and said, “Your dad died this afternoon on the way to the ambulance. His heart got blocked with blood clots.” I could not do anything but go to my room and sit in silence with the lights out. I told myself I would not cry but the tears came rushing down my eyes.
For three years I held on to that anger and that got me into loads of trouble. Different events occurred where I was smoking, drinking, and having sex. I knew it was not right but I did not know what to do anymore. I felt like God abandoned me and did not hear my cry, but one night I cried out to him saying, “I give it all up to you God, the hurt and the pain. I do not want to feel this anymore, I want to be free from bondage”. He heard my cry and it took a lot for me to pull myself together to change my ways.
I had faith to believe that I could come through all these situations. I had God and my dad watching over me and speaking peace into my life. I am at a point in my life where I feel joyful to live life. I can finally say, I believe.
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