This I Believe

cyrus - bowling green, Ohio
Entered on October 16, 2008
Age Group: 18 - 30

In American society today, divorce is such a accepted solution to a rocky marriage. 50% of marriages end in divorce so most of you will understand what I am talking about. People just see a tough situation and instead of deciding to work at it they just give up. As a spectator, and family member it’s tough to understand divorce and to watch it unfold. My parents got divorced when I was 16 years old. My mom walked out on my birthday dinner screaming and yelling at my dad. I didn’t know what was going on. I was taken by such a surprise in the next couple days as my dad told me my mom wasn’t going to come back. She cheated on him and when my dad confronted her she got angry, and at the same time my dad tried to keep it a secret from my two sisters and I, he tried to apologize to her at my birthday dinner, but she lost it and just walked out. That also marks the last time I have ever seen my mom, and hopefully I never will see her again. That is why I believe in loyalty and trust are two of the most important values one can posses. My mom was not loyal to my dad, thus my dad decided he could no longer trust her leading to their divorce.

Someone you can love so much, and trust ever more, can make one mistake to screw up everything. I had never felt so alone and out there, it was as if I was stranded on an island and had no one to relate too. Additionally, I’m not a very emotional person and even I cried. Not necessarily because I missed her, but because I didn’t know what was going to change in my life. I feared the change and I defiantly didn’t want it. I wanted my life to go back to normal but, I new that it never would. I felt so empty inside, as well as confused. I just didn’t get it, how could this happen to me? I thought my parents weren’t the type that would get divorced. I’ve seen people whom are miserable always fighting and arguing. I thought divorce was for them. My parents ran a business together, I never once saw them argue and I thought they were still very deeply in love. Throughout the course of their divorce I realized something very important; that relationships must revolve around loyalty and trust. In the case of my parents, it obviously did not.

Deception; that’s all it is, things can look very different then how they actually are and that is a frustrating and difficult fact of life, such that I don’t think many people will ever understand it. People have tried to tell me that my parents divorce is between them and to forgive my mom and talk to her again. She never realized what she did, not only to me, but to my family in a whole. She ruined the structure she ruined the basis and she most importantly she ruined my faith and belief in the system called marriage. Slowly since then I can understand more that marriage is possible but, it takes work. It takes effort and commitment. But, most important of all, I believe relationships revolve around trust and loyalty.