You Can Not Help anyone Who Doesnt Want Help

Sally - coolidge, Arizona
Entered on September 16, 2008
Age Group: 18 - 30
Themes: addiction, family

“Why wont you stop drinking?” This is the question I asked my father every since I was old enough to understand the pain an agony his drinking brought to our family. Through all of the suffering we endured trying to help him stop drinking but never worked I learned that you cannot help anyone who doesn’t want to get help.

A belief that expresses my approach on life is to live for your self and don’t worry about others because they will never stop their lives to worry about you. It was my last year of junior high and I was about to start high school. Never in a million years would I have thought that this would be the last summer I shared with my father. Although he had abandoned our family years ago when his addiction truly started to take a hold of his life it wasn’t till the day he actually left that I realized that my own father was not worried about the well being of his family but his main concern was the feeling of alcohol going down his throat sip by sip he let go of his family.

June 14,2004 was the day my life changed. As I walked into our living room I awoke to the normal arguing between my parents, but this time I could tell something bad was going to happen by the tone of my mothers voice. “ You have torn are family apart you can no longer be apart of us.” stated my mother as she was throwing my fathers belongings out of her room into the living room. “ I’m trying to stop I really am.” stated my father, but we all knew it was a lie this was the same story he had told us for years. As she continued to throw his belongings out of her room I looked at the expression on my fathers face it was so blank as if he did not care. When I turned to look at my mother I could tell from her eyes that she was tired of trying to help him and had gave up. Although it hurt are family to see him leave I honestly believe that it was a relief for my father to leave he walked out the door without turning back.

After he left our family it was hard for me to understand why he would leave us instead of just completely giving up on alcohol. Day to day I would try to tell my self that my dad would come back a changed man and I try to mend are family back together but eventually I gave up on such a foolish dream.

Finally , my belief that has shaped my life is that to live life to its fullest extent and you cannot help anyone who does not want to get help. Also if you try to help them it will only leave you hurt. By living by this belief it has helped me to become the independent women that I am .