Not Me

Colleen - Carlisle, Pennsylvania
Entered on August 15, 2008
Age Group: 30 - 50

My life contained going to Niagra Christian

College to work as a teen. I knew to always

devote my life to God, but my boyfriend came

first. Now, I married him for life as a nineteen

year old. But twenty-two years later, I divorced my alcoholic husband. We did not

have the same faith. I felt devasted because

I tried with my all. I stayed for the children,

but now they are scarred too. I tried to get

him to stop, but he lost his job. Therefore,

because I was connected to him, I lost my

house too. Now, a single mom, I go to church

every Sunday and tithe more than before.

I have a stable job, retirement of my own and

a nice savings. I don’t live in fear that I might

not work and put the economy in God’s hands.

I want everyone to know how I stay protected.

I don’t have cable. I watch Joel Osteen on

Wed. nights, & Beth Moore on Wed. mornings,

I watch Joseph Garlington on Sat. nights at 6:00-7:00. I listen to Christian music on 90.3. I sing in the choir at church every Sunday. I know it will perk me up to read The Power of Positive Thinking and listen to my Rita Springer CD. I light a candle and pray. God is there to help us with bills and knowledge, if we ask him. He even surprises me with his answers. I was just at the beach with my daughter. I took my bible and flipped to three scriptures. He opened the sky and made the seas. And another one is the clouds are his chariots and he rides on the wings of the wind. When you feel the wind, it is God. I will say that I am like a broken chair who has been put back together. I am stronger than ever before. Like many women in America I still say, “Why? Not me!”. But I will wait for the answers to come someday in heaven. My joy is over flowing now. I feel free as butterfly. I even write music and paint. I have tremendous energy and will make it on my own. A caution to all in devastating relationships. Be very careful not

to let it happen again. Keep God in the middle

and know the signs. God doesn’t want us to be belittled or yelled at. This I Believe.