Moments of Beauty

Catherine - Henderson, Nevada
Entered on June 28, 2008

Sometimes when I wake up in the morning, I wonder what it is that drives me to get out of the bed to start another day. Living in a world with war, genocide and superficiality it is hard for me to understand why I make the conscious decision to continue living.

I fell in love once. The feelings I had for this person were out of this world. I lost myself in the magically captivating moment of being held by this person and feeling completely safe. Just the same way I felt holding my Teddy Bear when I was little girl, as long as I had him, I was home.

But before I knew it, I was brought back to down to Earth because when I fell for him, I fell so hard I scraped my knee and broke my heart. My reality was turned upside down and I was left alone with what can only be described as emptiness.

When this happened, something changed in me. I became cynical and bitter with myself and the world. I thought for a second that there might not be a chance for me to enjoy life the same way ever again. Until one day I decided to go for a hike, and as I stood on top of the highest boulder I could find, my breath was taken away by the view. It was a new perspective. What I began to see was what I would imagine heaven would look like. That one minute while I stood there staring down at the world gave me a sense of relief and empowerment. It all came back to me. I was free and I remembered that I have it in myself to make my home anywhere.

This I believe is beauty.

A short and yet so sweet of a moment that forever changed how I looked at the world and myself. I believe it is these moments that move us to our core and shape our characters and attitudes, the way a sculptor carves stone into miraculous works of art.

It was a moment where it almost seemed to reach into me and touch my soul, making my chest swell and before I knew it, my eyes squeezed out a couple of tears. How something could tap into me in such a mysterious way, that I could only help but think that even Gods and Demons would envy us humans for being able to take in such powerful emotions. I believe these moments are beautiful because you must experience them for yourselves in order to understand and to see. Anywhere from death to love, to being reborn, I believe these moments are beautiful and if we pay attention to them, they can remind us that we are alive and that we are free.

So when I wake up in the morning and I have to look for motivation to step out of my bed I remember that I believe life is beautiful, and that I must seize every moment of it. Beauty in the world is what I live for.