Everyone has secrets.

Amy - lewiston, New York
Entered on June 5, 2008

If there’s one thing in life I have come to believe in, it’s that you shouldn’t judge your friends. There’s a reason that you became friends with them, and ninety-nine percent of the time, the things you fight about are petty and ridiculous. True friends will over look each other’s faults and realize that no-one’s perfect.

Everyone has secrets. I have secrets. Some secrets seem so big and bad that you worry that no one will understand. You keep them to yourself and don’t even tell your best friends for fear of losing them. Eventually however, most people’s secrets get out. Closets are only so big, and can only hold so many skeletons. I have a friend, and one day her closet flew open.

She couldn’t live with everything bottled up inside any longer. She told me and one other close friend her terrible secret. She is currently fifteen, and had moved here at the beginning of the school year. She never really answered personal questions, she was a mystery. Until now. She confided in us that she was a victim of childhood sexual abuse from her step father. She became a cutter to help herself cope for five years. When she was twelve she finally decided to go to the police. This led her to have a frayed relationship with her devastated mother.

This friend now cuts herself when things go wrong; when she has issues with her boyfriend, school and home. My friend and I came up with the plan to spend as much time with her as possible to attempt to keep her happy and not causing herself harm. Things went well until I left for a three week trip to China. While away my friend’s boyfriend broke-up with her. She was devastated and tried to kill herself. The day I got back my friend told me that he could no longer handle our friend and that he could not be friends with her.

The next week his own secret, that he dips, came out. All of his friends disapproved. They did not talk to him for a week in hopes that he would quit. The cutter was the worst about it, calling him a hypocrite, and turned several of his friends against him permanently. He now has an almost entire new group of friends because of his decision.

The way I see it you didn’t become friends with the person because they cut, or dip, you became friends with them because you like hanging out with them and they make you happy. Like I said everyone has secrets and when they come out how do you expect your friends to over look them and forgive them if you are not willing to do the same. I am still trying to help my cutter friend today, forgiving her faults because I know that one day my closet will swing open too, and I will have to believe that someone will be kind enough to do the same for me.