God where are you? Are you there? Why are you putting me through the pain and suffering? What is my destiny in this world and why did you put me here? I know you with me in my heart. You help me through every problem I go through and every trouble that happens to me. God I love you for that. You’re the greatest, thank you.
When I was ten years-olds, I received Jesus Christ as my Savior and into my life. My family would go to church every Sunday. I would always go to my Sunday school class. I loved Sunday school. Singing all those songs and listening to all the bible stories. I would just sitting there and be amazed at how God worked in peoples lives in the bible. That year I was baptized. I would never forget that day.
Once I was submerged in the water, I remembered seeing just a huge white cloud. From that day I knew God was with me and will always be my heavenly father. Once I grew older, I started understanding more things. I started to see what the really world is like. It sucked. My family has been going through so many problems. This hurt me so much. I would see my friends living the good life, while I’m just there keeping it all inside, just wanting to just start bursting in tear.
I remember in Sunday school, hear how God is the almighty. He can do anything. Let the blind see, cure sickness, and raise people from the dead. He did it all, but why does God put people through suffrage and pain? I thought God loved me. Why can’t God help me with all the pain I’m going through? So I started to shy away from God.
One day my mom got a call from my grandfather, saying my grandmother is going to die by the end of the week. Our family rushed down to Maryland as fast as we could. The doctors said that my grandmother had cancer and they could do nothing about it. Our family just didn’t know what do. Our grandmother was the base of our family. In the hospital I would just sit next to her bed and she would grab my hand and tell me to tell her stories. I would tell her stories about when I was little and how she took good care of me and raised me to be a good man. When she was asleep I would just cry still holding her hand.
I saw a bible next to my grandmother bed and I told God this, “Lord, I am sorry for what I have done to you. I should have never ran away from you. God, I beg you to just heal my grandmother right. You healed people and raised people from the dead. I beg you that you would just help my grandmother live.” The next day, she went in for a finally check up to see if the cancer spread. Doctors couldn’t find a cancer in her body. It was gone. God healed my grandmother and the next day she went home.
God works in so many ways that I will never know or understand. After that day, I never ran away from God every again. I do still question God and sometime still want to just burst tears. But I know that God is always with me and will solve my problems and help all the troubles I have in life. I may take forever, but I know it will happen. God I love you, thank you.
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