Freedom

Jordan - Plano, Texas
Entered on May 14, 2008
Age Group: 18 - 30
Themes: freedom, setbacks

Freedom

I believe in freedom, the breaking away of something holding me back, the kind of hold that will not let me breathe, grow and even live. This freedom can only be found deep within my soul as I finally decide to pull away from my abuser’s dark past and to break away from that thing that has been holding me back from my life.

Freedom means I can live my life, my way. I won’t have to carry the burden on my shoulders anymore. I will have a life that is all mine (not someone else’s); it’s my time now to let this strong shadow’s death grip release me. It’s my time to live my life without the interference of the abuse that scars me emotionally and even physically. It’s my time to be happy, my time to say goodbye and for the disfigurements to heal.

Living from the past, and pulling into the future only makes me into a fighter for surviving the impossible past. It makes me into a survivor for the future and for the freedom to be me. I’m a survivor for surviving the impossible. The constant abuse has done nothing but make me stronger. I’ve been pushed down for trying to do something for myself, but I’ve always held my head high, when my abuser thought she had won. Now it’s my time to say to her, “You’ve tried to damage me, but I haven’t fallen, I’m still standing, and I’m stronger than ever, I am the survivor of you.”

I’m breaking free of not living my life to the fullest and letting myself, be myself. The past affects the future, and now it’s mine, no one can punish (torture) me for my cries. Now I am my own future without all that burden that has been put on my shoulders. The abuse can’t hold me back anymore, and now I get my chance to grow and live and for once I’m going to smile because I’m going to happy, finally be happy. No one will be able to hold me down and suffocate me. Finally, I’m brushing this burden off my shoulders: I’m breaking free.