This I believe

Barbara - Pittsfield, Massachusetts
Entered on April 14, 2008

I believe that everyone has an inner light and it is our job to seek it and their job to shine it. On Wednesday my teacher told us this insight and added that our failure to search would lead to dislike for that particular person. I filed her statement away in my memory along with the golden rule and my pleases and thank yous. To be honest I considered this motto to be very brave until later that night when something connected and changed the confidence I had in it.

In high school it is especially easy to judge people’s characters and unfortunately we do it more often than we should. After making an assumption about a boy named Ryan, I realized if I had taken time to search for his inner light I would have found that he is not the hateful person I thought he was. He appeared heartless and mean, teasing our senior class and hating the school when he never really gave it a chance. I wished back every word I had spoken about him on Wednesday night when I found out his mom killed herself in June. It wasn’t the school he hated, it was his life. I judged him without looking for the best in him and the real reason he acts the way he does. I failed to see his inner light and in doing so lost the opportunity to be a friend.

On an additional level I have spent the last three years searching for a particular light that has seemed to dim as time progresses. I am beginning to wonder if her light has been smoldered by the very things she condemns everyday. She has spent holidays at my house and slept in my bed yet she lies and manipulates. I want so badly to break her from the nasty habit of pushing people who love her away. She consistently hurts me without knowing it yet I insist on finding the best in her. She has been through a fair share of struggles, which is why I have not given up on her. On the surface she is a good person but deep down she is cold and bitter. I hope for her sake she lets herself go and becomes the person she thinks she is. Unfortunately, I will never be able to find her light unless she is willing to shine it.