Love and Distance

Amanda - wayne, Michigan
Entered on April 12, 2008

When my fiancé came home from what I thought to have been a usual drill weekend at his Army Reserve Unit I noticed a distraught look on his face. Before he opened his mouth I already knew what he was going to tell me and I turned away and started to cry. He wrapped his arms around me and promised we would be okay, and that we would be coming home to me. He received orders for deployment to Iraq for a year.

He has now been gone for six months and each day that goes by I miss him and love him more. We have truly learned what kind of journey a deployment is on a relationship. We both had no idea what to expect because it was our first deployment together. I can still remember the day at the airport when he left; we cried and held each other for as long as we were allowed to before he had to leave for his long trip to the sandbox. The first three months were the hardest I cried everyday, had horrible nightmares, trouble sleeping, and always worried. Then my fiancé began to worry about me, and that was the last thing I needed him to do when he was gone fighting a war. So I changed my attitude and told myself that he would keep his promise to me and that he would be okay.

I started to workout everyday, and I have lost thirty pounds so far. I have about ten more to loose and I will be extremely happy. I talk to my fiancé everyday and we talk about his days and the dangers he faces. I think the reason why I am a lot happier and relaxed because I know what he is going through instead of living in a fantasy world thinking he isn’t in harms way. People often ask how I deal with hearing things on the news about soldiers dying or getting injured. I explain to them that it hurts and I always pray for them and their families but it doesn’t scare me. I am used to everything now, and I have faith in my soldier and in God to bring him home to me safely.

I believe that honesty and strength are to very important things in life, especially during obstacles like the one I’m facing with my fiancé now. We help each other everyday by telling each other what is bothering us, or what happened in our world today. Since we are living two separate worlds it is important to keep each other informed, even if it isn’t something one of us wouldn’t like to hear. Everyday we also say at least one positive thing to each other to make each other smile. It truly helps ease the pain of being apart from one another.

Since he has been gone I have learned a lot about life in general and about love. I believe that love is the most beautiful and powerful thing in the world, and it should never be taken for granted. Also you should not only love your partner, but love your family, friends, neighbors, and your maker. In my heart I believe that love can conquer any obstacle in life and grow stronger from distance and time apart.

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