A Long-Awaited Understanding

Marjan - New Brighton, Minnesota
Entered on February 22, 2008
Age Group: Under 18

I believe in the future and the hope that comes along with it. There is a natural goodness to life even though it seems like someone is always trying to throw a curveball your way. I need to believe that no matter what happens, somehow everything will work out in the end.

When I think about my personal philosophy, I can’t help but think about the experiences I’ve been through and how the world around me has made the greatest impact on my life and my beliefs.

There are a lot of people who see their issues and problems as worse than those of everyone else. No one will understand the pain or the sorrow they have experienced because no one has had to endure any type of similar ordeal. I admit this mindset because I used to be in that category of people.

I remember 7th grade. I came home from school to hear that my sister had run away from home. My sister and our family had always had issues, but things had really become a problem when my parents told my sister they were forcing her to switch schools in the middle of her junior year of high school. I’m sure there was a lot more going on in their relationship but I don’t think anyone was planning on being up front with the simple-minded 12-year-old.

My relationship with my sister was already a mess, aside from the stereotypical sibling rivalry issues. This only pulled us further apart. I never understood why she started fights with our parents over what appeared to be painfully unimportant. She separated herself from our parents and from me when she left and our relationship was basically non-existent for the next five years.

As time passed we remained distant, but we also both grew up. I was in the middle of my high school years when I finally understood what had pushed my sister away. No one needed to explain things anymore because I was going through the same issues with my parents and the constant disagreements about what was important in life. I was ready to follow my sister’s footsteps out the door when something amazing happened. We talked about the past.

I was finally able to forgive my sister for the things that I thought had been her fault for years. She was able to open up and give me the truth. I was so comforted knowing that there was someone else who had been through the same experiences as myself and it saved our relationship.

Although it took a few years for all of this to happen, it still did. I didn’t know at the time I would ever even be able to tolerate my sister again, but the future was waiting to turn things around. My relationships with my sister and with my parents may not be perfect, but through time, they have improved. After seventeen years, we’re finally a family.