This I Believe

Kirsten - St. David, Arizona
Entered on February 5, 2008
Age Group: Under 18
Themes: love

I believe that love is a learning experience, both good and bad. The first kind of love is heart-warming. It’s the kind where you feel so comfortable with that person; they spoil you, make you laugh, and probably even get along great with your family. This is the kind of person that you could spend the rest of your life with. It is the safer choice. But what about that one person that didn’t always treat you so great, made you cry just as much as made you laugh, and that wasn’t up to your family’s standards? While most people would never dream of spending their lives with that person, there are those of us who can’t seem to forget about him or her.

I am in a great relationship, the first scenario I talk about. My boyfriend treats me so well and I know he truly loves me. But you see, I also have an ex boyfriend that is still in my life. That relationship was the second kind I refer to. Although he cheated on me, lied to me, and ruined my self confidence, I still loved him with everything in me and I could never muster up enough courage to ever completely end things with him. That is, until my current boyfriend came into the picture. I always felt that I could never find anyone that would treat me good, so I just settled for the mediocre relationship.

Most people think I’m too young to have already been in love twice. Love has no age restrictions in my mind. Yes I am young, but it’s better to have learned these things at a young age, therefore I can move on with my life. I have learned from all my relationships—qualities that I want in a relationship and those I don’t. Friends ask me on a regular basis if I regret staying in that bad relationship for as long as I did. My answer is never the same; it all depends on the day that you ask me. Sometimes I know that staying in that relationship for long was bad mainly because my heart is still trying to heal from everything it went through; but other days I’m glad I went through that experience so early in my life. I am lucky enough to have an amazing boyfriend who reminds me on my bad days–where I feel like no one wants me and that I’m not good enough for anyone—that he loves me and wants to spend the rest of his life with me.

So yes, I made a mistake by staying in that bad relationship for so long, but I don’t regret it because I believe that everything happens for a reason. Someone once said, “Never regret anything that once made you smile.” This is a quote that I live by on a daily basis. Everyone needs to have a few mishaps in their love life before they truly know what love is. Love is a great learning experience that should never be taken for granted—this I believe.