I Believe Cancer is Evil

Amanda - Des Moines, Iowa
Entered on January 22, 2008

I woke up one day and my life turned upside down. The day I found out my best friend Katie had a brain tumor, I asked God, “Why, why Katie, she is only eleven years old.” Cancer made Katie very sick. At first Katie and her parents thought she had the flu. She was having very bad headaches and was vomiting a lot. As these symptoms progressed Katie and her family knew something else was wrong. She went to the doctor and had a cat scan and discovered it was cancer causing her all this pain.

Katie didn’t want anyone to know she had cancer because she didn’t want anyone to feel sorry for her. As she started her treatment, she started to losing her hair and missing school. People started talking and soon found out she had cancer.

The evident consequences of cancer required Katie to have surgery. Due to the surgery the doctors had to shave part of one side of her head. Her hair was thinning because of the treatment she was doing to try and get rid of the cancer. We had our first school dance coming up and Katie was wary about going. She felt self conscious about her head being shaved in one spot and the thinness of her hair. I begged Katie to go and even offered to wear a hat with her. I was damned to let cancer stop Katie from going to her first school dance. She decided to go but didn’t want to wear a hat. We had Aunt Rita come over to my house to do Kati’s and my hair. It was a miracle; Aunt Rita made Katie look like she had a full head of hair. She looked beautiful Katie was so happy. I will never forget the way she looked that night. We headed off to the dance and had the time of our lives. During the first slow dance, my brother Dave, who was just a grade above us asked Katie to dance. I will never forget the look on Katie’s face. She was so happy and excited he had asked her to dance. Cancer had killed Katie’s dreams until that night. Tears filled my eyes as I watched how happy Katie looked dancing with Dave. He had filled one of Katie’s dreams that night. She had never danced with a guy before nor had she had a crush until then. The camera guy took their picture as they danced. Katie bought the picture and set it next to her bed. Katie was truly happy that night.

It was now one year later and we were in 7th grade. Katie’s cancer was getting worse. Katie sat next to me on my couch holding my hand while she told my mom, our friend Lacey, and I she wasn’t going to be here much longer. Cancer was starting to take over her body and it was killing her. Later I was told she wasn’t going to make it past the 7th grade. When I heard that I just sat on the couch and cried. I couldn’t imagine my life without Katie. I hated cancer and I hated what it was doing to Katie.

Katie was the most selfless and strongest person I have ever met. No matter how much pain the cancer had caused her she never once felt sorry for herself. She wasn’t going to let cancer win. She wasn’t about to give up on her life. She tried everything to prolong her life. She tried all the experimental drugs, special vitamins, and steroids. The steroids made Katie puff up to where she was unrecognizable. Her face was so puffy it looked like a Cabbage Patch doll. I hated the way cancer made her look.

Katie succeeded in prolonging her life. She made it all the way to our 9th grade. By this time the cancer had taken over Katie’s life. She was very ill. She was limited to visitors because of how sick and tired she was. I visited her as much as I could. It was so hard to see Katie so helpless, there was nothing she could do, the cancer was killing her. Even though the cancer caused her to be so sick and in so much pain, it couldn’t take away her great personality. She was still cracking jokes and making me laugh. Katie wasn’t scared to die. She was ready to go, she couldn’t wait to walk and run again. She wanted her funeral to be called a party because we were suppose to celebrate she wasn’t suffering anymore. Katie wanted to help plan her party so she did.

Saturday December 2, 2000 I had a very strange but surreal dream. Katie had appeared in it but all I could see was the top half of her body and she was floating above me and some of our friends. She told us that we were all invited to her party. I woke up right after the dream and knew Katie had passed. Hours later I got the phone call saying she died early that morning. My heart sunk, I never have felt so much pain before in my life. As I fell to my knees with teardrops hitting the floor I asked God “Why, why did you take Katie away from us?” Later it appeared to me, it wasn’t God who took Katie away from her friends and family, it was cancer. Cancer had killed my best friend. Cancer caused my best friend pain and made her suffer for three years. I believe cancer is evil.