I believe in the unknown. Knowing my future or where I’ll end up in life does not concern me at this point. I love the idea of walking down the street and being clueless to where it could lead up. I enjoy the silence of mystery and the anticipation of what is to come. I love the suspense of everyday. So many people go through life waiting for something to change, something to happen. A moment where they can look back and say, “This is what I’ve been waiting for.” But if I wait too long for that one moment, what am I actually living for? I believe in the unknown because by not knowing my future, I leave myself with so many options. There isn’t one point or one moment that defines me. Every second of every day helps determine who I am.
Around Halloween this year my creative writing class racked their brains for ideas of scary stories. My pen flowed rapidly across the page, new ideas coming with every letter. I’d written everything down, I’d built up and up until I had reached the one point where the suspense was over: the monster of my story was about to be revealed. I stopped. Suddenly, the story had become harder to write. I could no longer formulate what it was I wanted to say. I scanned the room hoping for inspiration, but in the end, only a blank page sat in front of me.
When writing my scary story, I found out that I did not enjoy writing the climax. This was the point in the story where everything fell into place: the revealing of the evil spirit, the bloody vampire, or Frankenstein. If I wrote the climax, the story I had poured my soul into would no longer seem frightening. The fear and exhilaration that the unknown had brought would be gone as soon as I finished the paragraph. Why should I write the end and bring redemption to a story better left without answer?
I never divulged the secret of my story. It was open for people to draw their own conclusions and let them decide how scary the story would be. Still to this day, I pull out my story and read it. I always draw a different answer. I wait for no climax in life. I believe there does not always have to be one, and even if there is, getting there is just as worthwhile.
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