This I Believe

Z. - Newtown, Connecticut
Entered on January 3, 2008
Age Group: Under 18
Themes: forgiveness

I believe in the power of forgiveness.

Last month, my friend came up to me and told me in a shaky voice that she and my boyfriend had become a little more than “just friends”. Needless to say, I was devastated. I cried so hard my stomach hurt and my face ached. I wrote frantic letters to God, some hatefilled and some begging to change what happened, but nothing ever did.

More than anything in the world, I wanted to hate them both. I wanted to hate my best friend and my boyfriend. They had caused me such sorrow that I could barely stand it. But no matter how hard I tried, I never could.

I believe one of the toughest things in the world is to hate the two people you love most.

Immediatly after everything, they both sucked up to me. They acted like I meant the world to them, they called often, the bought me little gifts. I couldn’t stand it. I yearned for them to go away and leave me alone. For them to give me a real reason I could hate them, but they never did.

My friend wrote me a letter soon after telling me that she had learned her lesson and that she was really sorry. She wrote how she would like to continue being best friends, and that she knew it was a stupid thing to do. I started to feel better, the weight of hatred lifting from me.

Weeks later my boyfriend came up to me. We hugged for a moment, and then we pulled away, rushed to get to our next class on opposite sides of the school. As I began to turn away, I felt his hand on my sleeve. I turned around and he hugged me again.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered.

I’m sorry

I believe in the power of forgiveness.