This I Believe

Elizabeth - South San Francisco, California
Entered on December 19, 2007
Age Group: Under 18
Themes: forgiveness

My mother would always tell me, “Being mad at the world and always holding

grudges won’t get you anywhere.” She would always tell me that “If I don’t learn to get over things now then I won’t learn how to get over things later on in life.” The first time she told me was a summer day in the beginning of my freshman year, with her soft, serious voice. That look on my mother’s face made me realize that she knew what she was telling me. And that she has gone through situations like this before.

There have been many times in my 16years of life that people have just messed up in my life and done me wrong. I realized that the way I would always react was not the right way and is the opposite of the way I react now. What I’ve learned throughout these years has really been a change in my life and has made me stronger.

In middle school I had a boyfriend that I was with for two years on and off. One reason why we were always on and off was because he cheated on me. In many situations he cheated on me with other girls. When I would find out I would be so devastated. I would have absolutely no idea why he had done that to me. I would ask myself “Why?” and “What does she have that I don’t? What does he like about her?” repeatedly. My reactions to these situations were always not the best. I would always break up with my boyfriend and stop talking to the girls. Honestly, that wouldn’t do me any good. For any random reason I would want to pick fights with them, and that would just get me into trouble. But the good thing was that my brother, sister, and I were always close to the assistant principal and we wouldn’t get in trouble. That might have been why I wouldn’t care about picking fights with these other girls. At the time I didn’t realize that I was the only one looking pretty stupid for fight over a guy. Life goes on. There are plenty of other guys out in the world. That is why I decided to forgive my ex boyfriend and forgive the females too. And when I see any of them I just make it seem like it didn’t really hurt me and that nothing ever happened. That’s what I feel now, like I don’t care. And mo longer put myself down.

My sister and I also fight and argue all the time, and we stop talking to each other. Unfortunately our little arguments turn into some big, scratching, pulling hair, fist, kicking fights. And we always end up hurting each other physically, and emotionally. It’s hard being mad at each other because we really don’t get anywhere with it, we do so much with each other and share some of the same interests. But now when we do get in fights it hurts emotionally but at the same time I get over it because I’m not going to make myself feel bad for something that can easily be forgotten.

I believe that forgiving makes me stronger because I really don’t gain anything for being mad and holding grudges. If I was not to forgive then I would never get over the situation and I would always be upset, and distracted by always thinking about it. On the other hand things have changed throughout the years. I have learned to forgive because of what my mother told me. And she has made me realize that I should let the past go. It has made me stronger because I no longer keep situations that upset me in my head that have no point. It’s like what people say, “The past is the past. Let it go! We live in the present and live for the future!”