I believe in the ability to gain something from every situation. No matter what you may be faced with, you will never go through it without the ability to find the positive in it.
My parents divorced when I was eight. At 17 I am still struggling to cope with the hardships of divorce. While they have remained close friends and fighting between them does not pose the issue it does for many divorced families, it is still difficult for me to live as the child of divorcees.
My parents both remarried a few years after their divorce. I was never excepting of these newcomers to my life. With all the difficulty and inconsistency I had to face, the last thing I wanted was for these virtual strangers to become such a major part of the situation that was already so complicated.
With the introduction of my stepbrother, I began to loath my situation to the fullest. I was just old enough by the time he came into my life to crave independence yet still want to hold onto my childhood for dear life. This new addition made that ever more clear as I saw my fathers attention split between the two of us. The man that used to tuck me in at night, read me my favorite books, and sing that special song with me every time we drove across the bridge over downtown on our way home, was now doing the very same thing to this child who wasn’t even his. I watched my new brother living my childhood with my father and felt neglected and alone more than ever before.
Moving into my teen years, I delved into the natural teenage path of dislike for the decisions my parents have made for my life and a desire to make those decisions myself. I hated having to switch houses every 4 to 5 days to see the parent who I have been without for the greater part of the week. I hated not knowing which house I would be going to after school. Sometimes, my only wish was that I could just stop living out of a suitcase, be able to hang my clothes up in my closet and know that in a week everything will be the same. These feelings played out much more with my mother than with my father. Sometimes I felt that life would be much better were I to just move in with my father and not have the effects of their divorce constantly looming over my head.
While many of my feelings from childhood still hold true, the more time I take to reflect the more I have come to realize were it not for their divorce I would have never met the two wonderful people that they are married to today. I would not have the stepbrother who I have become so close to and whom I love with all my heart. I would not have the expierinces that have helped me discover so much about myself. In many ways their divorce was a blessing to everyone. My parents are happier than they have ever been and I have not one but two families who love me and who I know will always be there for me.
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