Why do some people believe in god? Is it true that He controls everything we are doing and will be doing? Have you ever thought any of those questions before? I have. I was born in a Christian family. Since I was a little girl, my family taught me everything about Christianity. I grew up knowing that I have to believe in God. When I was old enough, those questions came into my mind. I have tried figure the answers for these questions, but I could not. It started to affect my life. I drifted far away from God. I felt that I was going to be okay without having to believe in God. However, I was wrong. God always has a good plan for me.
It was last year when I finished the biggest exam of the year that was given by the Indonesian government. The exam determined whether the students would pass the junior high to be able to continue to senior high. I studied as hard as I could to make my parents proud of me. I took the exam with confidence that I would pass it with high scored, but I was wrong. I made low scores on the exam. I knew I could not enter the high school that I wanted with the scores that I made.
I did not go home, I kept walking without any direction. The only thing that was in my mind was how to tell my parent about my results. Suddenly I stopped walking, I turned around and walked the other way. I walked toward a church that I had just passed by. I went inside and saw a big cross, I fell on my knees and started to cry. I felt so sinful. Then, somebody touched my shoulder and said, “God never left you alone”. I turned around and saw a pastor. Without even thinking who he was, I told him everything that had just happened.
After I got done, he told me to go home and tell my parents everything that had just happened. I told him I could not do that, I did not want to make my parents disappointed. Then, he told me that sooner or later it would not make any difference. God already planned everything that had happened to me. I realized that he was right, and decided to go home. I went home and saw my parents were waiting for me with apprehensive faces, and then I started to cry. My parents tried to calm me down, and then they started to smile. I was so confused, they told me that they had decided to send me out of the country for school. At that time I was so happy, it was a great opportunity for me to learn many different things. And now, I do not just become more independent, but also I learn to never doubt God’s plan in my life. I believe in His plans in my life.
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