This I Believe

Amanda - st. louis, Missouri
Entered on December 11, 2007
Age Group: Under 18
Themes: creativity

Expressing Myself Through art

Art is my passion. Since I was little, I have always wanted to focus on art and attend an art college. Ever since I entered my first year of high school, my drawings have become more developed. I often find myself expressing my thoughts by the use of paints, charcoals and even pastels. But since my drawings have been more expressive, it seems that people have begun to criticize my art and the way I present my drawings. I believe that I am allowed to create something out of nothing to express what I am feeling.

During the first semester of my sophomore year, I began to devote more of my attention to my sketch book than to my classes and my teachers. Whenever there was a moment of free time at school, I would take out a pencil and draw whatever was on my mind. One morning during second block, I was working on an extended colored pencil drawing. My drawing was a self portrait, except I had drawn many hands clawing and grabbing at my face, as if the hands were trying to tear my skin cleanly off. By slipping on my headphones, I blocked out the loud atmosphere of my classroom. As I had began to focus my mind only on my art, a boy in my grade sat right in the seat behind me and glanced over my shoulder. The boy stared at my drawing for awhile and then asked me, “Do you need to go see a counselor? Because this is really scary.” I do not like to make conversation with people I hardly know, so I quickly shook my head from side to side and ignored him.

I did not like the fact that someone automatically disliked my drawing because it seemed different to them. He had not even asked for the meaning behind my art. And the fact that he decided not to like my ideas made me upset because I want other people to relate to my artwork. The boy in my class had made me feel like an outcast that day. Of course I do not want to be thought of as scary or weird, but I also do not want to be the same as everyone else.

Even though my classmate does not like the way I express myself, I continue to regularly bring my sketch book to class everyday. I continue to express my mind and strive to be different than other people in the class.

I believe that it is okay to express myself anyway I want to. I believe that showing my creativity brings uniqueness within me. A lot of teenagers my age want to fit in and they will listen to others instead of listening to themselves. But I choose to show my creativity however I want to because I believe that there is nothing wrong with showing thoughts through a picture.