This, I Believe: We are all Idiots

Brandon - Muscle Shoals, Alabama
Entered on December 7, 2007
Age Group: 18 - 30
Themes: humanism

Yes, you heard me right. Since we are all human, I believe we are all stupid. Before you start throwing tomatoes, carrots, potatoes, and whatever vegetables you have at hand at me, hear me out. You may consider yourself smart. You may have a 4.0 GPA. You may have been in the National Honor Society in high school. You may even have an IQ of 150. Surely, though, you have had what I like to call a “brain fart.” A point in time where it seems like your brain stops functioning, as if a Cease and Desist order has been sent to your brain to keep you from saying or doing something, no matter if it is stupid or smart. Some people even manage to continue functioning through a brain fart and make coherent, albeit mostly stupid, statements. We sometimes call these people “politicians.”

Some people I know like to disagree with me and say that everyone has the same equally-high intelligence capacity; it’s just our individual willingness to learn and apply knowledge that makes us more or less intelligent. To this, I say: have you ever heard of a village idiot having a “smart fart”? A spark of genius that astounds people and makes them wonder why they became degraded to the “village idiot” spot? No, they’re a village idiot for a reason.

My belief and theory of stupidity also explains the myth of the “dumb blonde.” Given that a large portion of society (possibly even the majority) are blonde, it goes without saying that blondes are in the public eye more than those of any other hair color. With Paris Hilton and Britney Spears leading the way for blonde publicity, surely the public will learn that not all blondes are dumb….wait…never mind.

If even the most intellectual of us have these moments, it is my belief that we all are of this base, stupid, idiotic nature. There are some, though—the ones with 4.0 GPAs, the ones in the National Honor Society, the ones with an IQ of 150—that rise above the basic nature of humanity. If you are one of these people, then congratulations: you’re not quite as stupid as the rest. However, don’t go gloating about it: brain farts happen at the least opportune moment, and usually make the unfortunate victim look dumber than Paris Hilton…at any time of day.