This I believe there is no past tense in love. I don’t think that anyone can date somebody for a long period of time then one day just decide they don’t love them anymore. If they’re telling them they love them every single day, then how’s that next day years down the road any different. If you love somebody then you’ll love them no matter what, even if you couldn’t put beside your differences to be together, and work things out. I believe it’s either you love them or you never did.
The summer before my junior year I just happened to run into this guy named Nathan, at a guy friend’s house one night. We definitely had a past and were no strangers to each other. I had liked him ever since I could remember. We tried dating two different times, but it only lasted about a month because of different reasons. I really haven’t talked to him in a long time when I ran into him that night, so he asked if my number was still the same and I said yes. Then it started all over again.
By the time school started we were officially dating. Everything was great and I had a feeling it was finally going to work this time. We were together all the time, and rarely argued. I was loving it! We got really close over the next few months together. I thought I was beginning to fall in love with him, but I wasn’t going to tell him even if I knew for sure. So it was getting close to Christmas time, and one night up at his granny’s he finally told me he loved me. I was in shock because it was totally unexpected, and I just looked at him. I seriously couldn’t even tell him back. I was so relieved that he had finally told me, so now I could tell him.
After we had got that awkwardness out of the way, one day didn’t go by that we wouldn’t tell each other “I love you!” It was great and I loved it. We talked about our future plans and funny stuff that you just talk about; like how many kids you’re going to have and stuff. We often argued over stupid stuff because we were both stubborn, but I never thought it would end up like it did.
We dated for around two years, until the day I found out he was talking to my best friend. It sucked that the two people you trusted the most, both screwed you over. It went on and he tried to tell me he just didn’t want a girlfriend, but I knew better. Over this summer I went and saw him every two or three weeks, and I would talk about wanting to get back together. Although I would be the one talking and he just said he didn’t want a girlfriend. I loved him and I thought that would be enough to keep us together, but it wasn’t. One night I called him because I was tired or waiting and hoping that we were going to get back together. Finally, he just came out and said that I needed to move on and find somebody else. When I asked if he still loved me, he made the statement that he didn’t love anybody. Therefore, that’s all I needed to know to move on. I told him if he could set there and honestly say he didn’t love anybody then he never loved me to begin with.
This I believe there is no past tense in love, it’s either you do or you never did. Just because he said he loved me didn’t mean we had to be together. If he honestly meant it when he said he didn’t love anybody, then he never really loved me to begin with. There’s no “I used to love you” and ‘loved’ isn’t a word. There is no past tense to love. If you love someone you will always love them no matter what, because its either you do or you never did.
If you enjoyed this essay, please consider making a tax-deductible contribution to This I Believe, Inc.