I believe in showering daily. Each night around ten o’clock after I’ve finished all of my work, I’ll climb into a warm soothing shower where I can rinse off the stress and problems of the day. Some people go to churches, others go to bars to reflect, but I choose the shower. Showering generally keeps you clean for a day (sometimes more, sometimes less), and if you miss a day you probably feel a bit grimy. The same goes for personal reflection, it is just as important to reflect on a daily basis as it is to shower, and if you miss a day, stress builds up just like dirt.
The key to true happiness is found in the discovery of self, and every night in the shower I reflect on my life in an attempt to figure out who I really am. I’ll ask myself simple questions such as, “Was today a good day or a bad day? Why?” If there were positive, constructive things that happened in that day I try to build on them, and if there were negative things, I think about how to eliminate them. During my reflection, I think about my friends and family, and how I’ve contributed to them that day. I reflect about my weakness as a people pleaser, and check in to make sure I am doing things because I want to and not because other people are pressuring me into it. I find out things every day about myself by reflecting on things that I otherwise would have overlooked.
Before I began reflecting, I lived a very unclean life that was consumed by parties and deceitfulness. I would justify my actions with lies such as, “It was overpriced, so I just stole it.” Or, “Drugs and alcohol are the only thing that can relieve my stress.” It wasn’t until my third year in high school when my teacher assigned my class to write a paper on what relationships were important to us and why. It was the first time I had reflected on something of any importance. I initially tried writing the paper about my friends, but I couldn’t do it because I realized that the relationships with my group of friends at that time revolved solely around partying. I realized that happiness to me was being intoxicated, and that I had been living a very superficial life by lying to myself. I ended up writing the paper about my family because I realized that they genuinely cared about me and loved me unconditionally.
The night I wrote that paper, I remained in my shower under the blissful hot water for about thirty minutes allowing the confusion and anguish to flow off of me and into the drain. From that point on I began doing this on a nightly basis, and in the process, slowly discovering who I am.
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