This I Believe

Lauren - Huntley, Illinois
Entered on November 12, 2007
Age Group: 18 - 30
Themes: death

I believe everyone in their high school career, at least, once hears about a high school death. Many people know the person, but aren’t very close to them. I, on the other hand, have witnessed the pain it feels to lose a friend or in my case a best friend. That is why I believe losing a friend is the hardest thing you have to go through in your life.

Yes, you might be thinking, there are so many harder things to deal with in life than losing a friend. Yes, there might be, but you can overcome them if you really try. For example, if you have no money you can overcome that by getting another job. If you break up with your boyfriend or girlfriend trust me there are other fish in the sea. But you can’t overcome a death. That person will never be there again to help you get through the hard times. You will never be able to see their smiling face. You can think of all the memories you had together but you have to realize you can’t make anymore. That sorrow will live with you forever and you can’t let it go.

On the day of October 16, 2007, I got a call from my friend. He told me “Megan committed suicide last night.” I didn’t believe him at first. I mean Megan killing herself? Megan was the sweet, loving girl everyone went to when they were sad about something or just needed a friend. When I got home, I realized it was true. I just broke down and cried. Megan and I knew each other since kindergarten. We had so many great memories. One of my favorite memories is the first time she ever called me “Wattsie”. That was her nickname for me.

It didn’t totally hit me that she was gone until the wake. When I got there, I never saw a line to see a person, that long in my life. I was so happy to see how much people cared to come. I saw my friends and we hugged each other, cried and looked at the million pictures that were displayed of her and us. When I arrived at the front, and saw her mom and dad. I couldn’t help but start crying. When her mom saw me she drew out her arms and said “WATTSIE.” When I knelt down and saw her body, I couldn’t stop crying. She looked so different. Her eye make up was perfect, which it never usually was. All I kept thinking was why? Why did she have to do this? She doesn’t deserve this.

No one will ever know why Megan decided to end her life so soon. She changed my life and many others in so many ways. It hurts so much to know I will never see her again. Death is one of the worst feelings you can ever encounter. The sorrow you feel knowing you will never see that person again hurts so much and will never go away. This I believe.