This I Believe

Jasmine - San Francisco, California
Entered on November 8, 2007
Age Group: 18 - 30
Themes: children

Sex Without Consequences: Abortion

Many people make poor decisions. One of those poor decisions is having unprotected sex. A big consequence of having unprotected sex is getting pregnant when you’re not ready. Even though I believe that having an abortion is wrong, it would be ideal for a woman to choose to have and abortion, depending on the situation.

When I was 16 years old, I was in an un-healthy relationship with a boy who I ended up being with until I reached the age of 20, and in the time of those 4 years, I got pregnant. Twice.

The first time I found out I was pregnant was when I was 19 years old. I showed my boyfriend the results of the home pregnancy test and he was furious and kicked me out of his house. At about 1am, he and his friend were outside of my house yelling (to the point where the neighbors came outside) and threatened not only me, but my family as well, that if I didn’t get an abortion, they both would harm my family and me. I cried myself to sleep that night because I knew that I would have to end the life of this fetus already growing inside of me. Three weeks later, I was leaving Planned Parenthood with the situation behind me.

A month before my 20th birthday, I found out that I was pregnant again. This time I told my boyfriend the news instead of showing him the test. He didn’t say anything to me but did give me a little chuckle and thought I was playing a joke on him. After a week passed, he said to me, “You’re gonna get an abortion right? Sorry, but I’m not tryin’ to be a Daddy right now.” I told him that I wanted to keep the baby and that I didn’t want to have to go through the whole “abortion process” for a second time. Once again, he threatened to leave me and would not have anything to do with me ever again, if I kept the baby. The day before I turned 20 years old, I was leaving Planned Parenthood again, but this time full of regret and depression.

For a whole month after I had my second abortion I felt miserable, sad, and depressed. All my boyfriend and me did was fight numerous times a day about the situation. One day, I finally thought to myself, why would I want someone like this to be the father of my child? I finally left him on July 1st, 2007.

Even though I had two abortions, I still think it’s wrong to do and I regret that I had no choice but to do it. There are so many negative things that may come out of it. If you’re young, it can be very harmful to the body because the body may not be fully developed yet. It can lead to emotional distress and you can be at risk for depression.

Women that have been in situations where they were raped, having an abortion would be a way out for that situation. There are some women out there who do want to keep the baby but just can’t afford to have one. The environment where the un-born child will grow up may not be healthy for him or her. Some women may not be healthy enough to bare a child. In these cases, yes, having an abortion may be the sensible choice to make.

But the young women who are having unprotected sex and who are being irresponsible about the choices they make, should not think that getting an abortion will fix the problem. Technically, yes, it will but having that option makes it seem like it’s “okay” to have unprotected sex when in reality it’s not. Teens think that just because abortion is an option these days it’s okay if they get pregnant. You put yourself at risk not only for getting pregnant but also STDs and other diseases that can be worse later on in the future. You will only be harming yourself in the long run.

I have two friends that got pregnant while they were in high school and it was a big shock to hear the news. They both knew they had the choice of getting an abortion but didn’t want to and felt that having abortions were wrong and they had to deal with the situation they’re in and not run from it. They both graduated from high school on time and having the babies did make them “grow up” faster and be more responsible. Both of their babies are grown and healthy and they have no regrets of the choices they made.

For a long time I thought that abortion was considered a murder and that God would condemn me, hate me forever and send me to hell for doing what I did. For the most part, I still do. But deep, down in my heart, I KNOW that abortions are wrong and women shouldn’t do it. But, if it weren’t for my abortions, I probably would have been struggling and in a worse situation than I already was in.