This I Believe

Ana - Colima, Mexico
Entered on October 30, 2007
Age Group: 18 - 30
Themes: forgiveness

The power of forgiveness

By: Ana Sofía Sánchez G.

“Making mistakes is something human, but forgiving is something divine”

Many times we don’t want to forgive someone because we feel like we are betraying ourselves, not taking the right decision or even too angry to accept it, but the truth is that being mad and not getting over problems over the time, just makes us sick inside and out.

Many people think that not forgiving is some kind of punishment for their aggressors, in other words, they think that in some way, forgiving frees the ones who hurt them from their guilt.

The truth? It is us, who by keeping alive the resentment and hate, remain trapped in this negative feelings that are bad for our peace, mental and physical health.

I remember this time when I got to grade 9, and there was this new girl at my school who had no friends, so I introduced her to my old friends, and things were going right as far as I could see, but after a while, my friends started going apart from me, they didn’t look for me as much as before, so I started to open my eyes, and it was that girl, whom I had given all my friends to, she was telling things about me that were just some bunch of crap invented by a desperate girl.

First I was angry of course, I evaded her and I just couldn’t look at her, of course I spoke to my other friends and things went back to normal, but I just couldn’t stand her.

It was then, when she had no friends, again, that I walked up to her, after like a month, and asked to come sit with us, she looked at me, she smiled, and she stood up and followed me.

This was when I learned that forgiving her had made me a better person and made school life much easier for me.

I believe that forgiveness isn’t to forget, let go, or take importance away from a certain situation, but rather to analyze a problem and learn from it, considering taking action to fix it, not just to forget about it.

I believe that forgiving isn’t about accepting the bad actions others make or that they don’t have any consequence and I definitely think that keeping your feelings inside always leads to bad.

As Caroline Myss, an author and doctor, says: “keeping resentment alive is like having a scar and having it opened over and over again as soon as it heals”.

When you forgive you get this feeling of relief and moving on, and when you don’t you just get mind-sick, frustrated and even angry for life.

So what I believe is that forgiving is something we do for ourselves and not for the person who has hurt us, this means that no matter how angry we are at someone, or how they may not deserve to be forgiven, we should stop and think for a second that we are really doing it for our own health and well being.

Late studies have shown that the average person that knows how to forgive, increase their vitality, appetite, patterns of sleep and their energy up to 15%. So this gets me thinking… why don’t we just forgive if its so good? Maybe we are too busy thinking about others and not about ourselves.

I believe that we should forgive but never forget, so that we remember what happened and learn from it so we don’t make the same mistakes again, learn from the situation and have a happier life without that matter.

Now, next time you feel resented at someone, what would you do? Would you be able to forgive and free yourself? Think about it.