Occasionally, after a stressful week at work, my father comes home as a ticking time bomb. One time, after a particularly stressful week of working from nine pm to seven am, he was ready to explode and take his discontent for his shift out on his job. As soon as he got home, he started to go back to his bed to rest. Then he passed by my room, and upon seeing the mess on my floor, the bomb went off. We got into a heated discussion, and it took all of my focus to keep from exploding myself. After a few minutes I was almost ready to resort to violence, but I realized why he had gotten so angry over something so trivial. It was not that he really cared about the mess that much, he got angry about the situation because he was under a lot of stress and needed a way to vent it and the anger from his job. After this realization, it suddenly became a lot easier to let him get all of his anger out and to keep myself from retaliating. When the argument was over, my father apologized for the way he had gotten so angry with me, and he explained why he was under so much stress.
From that day on, whenever I get into an argument, I try to see it from the side I‘m not on. When stepping into someone else’s shoes, the situation becomes so much easier. If someone is mad try to find out why. Then apologize in a manner that calms him down. If done correctly, the friendship will have come out intact. And if someone is about to vent some anger, try to calm them down, and keep him from ruining his friendships with those that might have been near when he cant take it any more. So, next time, step into their shoes and save them from themselves.
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