This I Believe

Michael - Dallas, Texas
Entered on October 15, 2007
Age Group: Under 18
Themes: family, love, setbacks

There is a common idea in the three universal theologies of Buddhism, Christianity, and Islam: show love and compassion for your fellow man. This concept sounds relatively simple, but I have wondered if that is all there is to it; after much reflection, I believe that life can only be acknowledged if there is a presence of negative entities in one’s existence.

For nine years I never questioned my beliefs, if they even existed at that age, about religion, life, and love; I was as happy a little imp as possible. It was nothing more than the turn of the millennium at the time, but in a short while my life took the turn for the worst. In February of 2000, my parents had an atrocious argument; the result was a separation the signaled the close to the ten-year marriage. At school that day, I felt something… unusual. It wasn’t the love, fear, or respect of my parents that I was used to; that day I clearly remember as the first day of my life that I hated my parents. I hated my father for lying, and I hated my mother for threatening. Thus began an uncontrollable cycle of hate in my life.

Three years later, the affects of the separation where evident: I hardly talked to anyone, angered at all who ignored me, yet bitter towards all who approached me. Then, exactly three years after the separation, my parents divorce was finalized, and my father was sent to jail for a few months. It was upon his being sent to jail that I realized how much I had come to hate people. I was shocked, after despising the man for a few years, when I was reunited with the idea of love from the adoration I subconsciously had for my father. For the first time since the break up, I wept. This time, however, it was tears of sadness instead of fury. I finally recognized love again, and the person who stirred the love was being sent to jail!

I was not instantly cured of my hatred of mankind, but after feeling such intense feelings, the love I began to redevelop burned fiercely, and I doubt that it should if I felt no remorse towards the events surrounding my life. I could not have seen how bright the light was if I did not lurk in the purest darkness first. It is such that I believe.