“Lie for Protection”

Jeanette - Belleville, Michigan
Entered on August 11, 2007
Age Group: Under 18
Themes: integrity, love

Most see a lie as a betrayal, it is something that mothers have forbidden their children to take part in, but they still do. The reason for that is protection, lies are formed to protect rather than always betray. I have always used a lie to protect myself from things that I feared or did not want to take part in. However, I never realized a lie as a type of protection for anyone else. When someone lied to me I had always saw it as a betrayal until just recently.

When I first started dating the guy who is now my fiancé there was another girl. That girl had been his friend since they were young but I figured they were more. My fiancé promised that they were nothing more then friends so I stayed with him. Even after he had promised that the two of them were just friends I did not like the thought of it so I forbid him to talk to her. I told him that it was either she or I, luckily he chose me.

Two years had passed since they had talked and he wanted to see how she was but he never said a word to me. I found messages that they were sending to each other on Myspace and flipped out. I was furious and asked him if they had hung out or talked on the phone, he told me no. I wanted to believe him but I was not satisfied so I talked to the girl. I found out from her that my fiancé had lied to me and I immediately labeled the lie as betrayal.

After I was done being flipy about the situation my fiancé and I sat down and talked which is when I realized he lied to protect us. The lie was to protect our relationship because he knew I would toss him to the curb. I now understand the whole situation and it has helped me to believe that not all lies people tell are to betray me. I believe that others tell lies to protect what is most important to them rather than always betray.