This I Believe

Benose - Loxahatchee, Florida
Entered on July 5, 2007
Age Group: 18 - 30

My Personal Experience

I truly believe that you cherish everyone in your life because they may not always be there. I remember that one cold night. On Saturday, March 10, 2001, is my one of my worst nightmares. It was that one night when all my dreams and hopes crashed down on my shoulders. It is the most unforgettable night of my life. It is a night where fairy tales turned not into happy endings.

I was at the Building. The Building is a place where we go every Saturday night to hang out. The boys were playing basketball. My friends and I were having a blast. There had all sort of things you can imagine. There were people selling food, clothes, and house supplies. There were competitions among boys, girls, and grown-ups as well, for the Basketball Championship game. All of a sudden, I had this feeling that something was not right. I explained to my friends how I felt. They told me to brush it off and to enjoy myself. I lived for that one moment without worrying about what tomorrow might bring.

My second parents received a call from my biological father that same night. They looked surprised and hurt. I was so confused that I did not know what was going on. We ended up going home early. I could not face up my fear to ask them what was wrong. My parents were always talkative, but they were so quiet and reverend that night. My siblings questioned them but did not receive an answer. The drive home was so long like in those movies when there’s a chase which takes forever. During those times, crazy thoughts were jumping in my mind. I questioned myself “what could possibly be wrong?”

I did not get my answer until the following Sunday morning. All of our plans for the morning were cancelled such as doing the laundry. Around 11 am, my real father showed up at my house. They called my brother and me in the play room. At first, I thought my dad came to get us since he always said that he would. I did not like that idea. Finally, my dad told us that our real mother had passed away yesterday. I was so shocked that I thought they were joking. However, they were not playing that was reality. She was gone forever from us. I cried. I cried. I cried. I cried. I spent the entire day crying. I tried to eat, to drink and to sleep, but it was in vain. I was so angry with the world and myself. I wanted her back in my life.

I regretted the fact that she never really knew how I felt about her. I never told her that I loved her. She always thought I did not care about her. I was always afraid of expressing my true feelings. Our relationship was not perfect. We always had arguments. It was because we were too much alike. When I think about my future which she will not be part of, I wish she could come back to live. If I could get one more chance to tell her how I feel, I would cherish it forever. There is a saying that states, you never really know what you have until it is gone. It was too late for me to realize that.