This I Believe

Cory - South Haven, Michigan
Entered on June 21, 2007

Becoming Her Mother

My mother has sacrificed a great deal for my brother and I. She became pregnant with me when she was only 19 years old. She wasn’t married to my father and did not come from a rich family. She was so young and still had a lot of things she didn’t have the chance to experience. She didn’t have the chance to get her college degree and start her career all before she was thirty years old. She could have lived with my grandparents for as long as she wanted after she had me. But she got an apartment she probably never wanted and hated living in so she could get aid for her and I. When many people her age were going to college parties and studying late into the night, she was rocking her colicky baby to sleep all by herself. Nineteen months after I was born my mother had another son. As she says she had “two babies in diapers.”

But still she sacrificed it all for us. She worked and still does work long hours in factories, sometimes having to get up at ungodly hours of the morning just to pay the bills. I often wonder why she sacrificed all her wants and desires for her children. I mean there are so many mothers who don’t sacrifice anything for their children. Some of her friends were more worried about their mates or their drugs or alcohol while their children were just an afterthought. The only reason I can think of as to why my mother sacrifices so much is because she is her mother, my grandmother. My grandmother until her dying day gave everything she had to her family and friends.

I see this in my mother as well. Since my grandmother died my mother took over the matriarch role in our family, even though she is not the oldest daughter my grandparents had. My mother gives her time, money, energy, everything she has to seeing that not only her children but the entire family is well taken care off, like my grandmother did when she was alive. Maybe that is why they were so close and in a way still are to this day, because they are so much alike. As my mother ages she starts to talk like my grandma, walk like my grandma, even look like my grandma with certain facial expressions of hers.

I still don’t know why they give (or in my grandma’s case gave) so much of themselves and got little in return. I mean yeah our family loves them but we don’t show it as much as we should. But still they sacrificed and set aside their wants and needs just so others can be happy and well taken care of. Maybe I’m too selfish to understand why they sacrificed. Maybe I won’t understand until I’m older and a parent myself. But I do appreciate all they do and did for us. I guess in a way my grandmother is still alive, because my mother year by year is becoming her mother.