This I Believe

Stephanie - Lacey, Washington
Entered on June 19, 2007

I believe that only you control yourself. I’m sure everybody has said at one time, or has heard someone say “but it’s their fault I did it” or “they made me sad, or angry, or frustrated”. While it is true that other people contribute to how you feel, you have the final decision. If someone says something mean to you, you can choose to ignore it and let it roll off you. If someone hits you, you can choose to let it go and not retaliate. If you do retaliate, it is not their fault, it is yours.

Recently I learned the importance of choosing how you feel. One day, three of my best friends just didn’t talk to me anymore. I would ask them questions and they would answer with only one or two words. I then found out that they were talking about me behind my back, calling me a b**** and various other things. When I asked them what I did to make them hate me, they wouldn’t tell me, just ignored me some more. At first I was angry, and most people would agree that I had a right to be. But then I decided not to let them control how I felt. I decided that I was going to have a positive attitude about the whole situation and wouldn’t let them get to me.

I started talking to different people, people that before I had ignored because I was in my own group. I realized that I had been missing out on a lot by not straying outside my immediate circle of friends. I also realized that if they didn’t like me, that was their loss, not mine. Obviously they didn’t appreciate me for the person I was and I knew that I deserved better.

It has been over a month now that my ex-friends started ignoring me. I have grown a lot from the experience and now realize that I am better off without them. As much as they might try to hurt me, I won’t let them. Because I believe that only I can control myself.