This I Believe

Erin - Winterville, North Carolina
Entered on June 10, 2007

Looking In the Mirror

I am twenty years old, so I would say I have been looking in the mirror for about seventeen years now and understanding that the reflection looking back is me. I do not consider myself old or wise but mature and open-minded for my age. There were years when I hated the reflection in the mirror and I struggled as an individual; mainly because I was not an individual. I was strictly part of the crowd, or evidence of conformity. I explicitly thought highly of myself, but implicitly I struggled with my weight, growing up with divorced parents, and always feeling as though that I needed a boyfriend. The worst parts were feeling as though I was not “truly” part of the crowd and the consistent conflict that would arise between my mom and me.

Sometime between my freshman year of college and now (I am a senior) I have grown up and matured so much. I have had a lot of encouraging events in these few years, some I am proud of and some that I am not. Additionally, all the cliché and superficial aspects of my life that were once so entirely significant all of a sudden faded away. My life is almost like that song “I can see clearly now the rain is gone . . .”

I believe that time and both positive and negative experiences will only allow me to become more passionate about life and continue to finally love what I see in the mirror. Regardless of the mistakes that I have made during adolescence or the confusion about myself, I still found the person that I want to be. Not only am I happy with myself, I have found my destiny and the field of study that completely absorbs my true passion, marriage and family therapy. The belief that I have found within myself through out time has given me the knowledge, and the confidence to pursue my goal to become a marriage and family therapist. On the other hand, I know that I will always make mistakes, but my belief of a positive image, inside and out, will always try to intervene and I will continue to march at my own beat.

Although there are days when I look in the mirror and still wish that there was more to the image, I know that with personal inspiration, my own understanding of my surroundings, and goals that I have set for myself, I am only fulfilling a better image inside that most importantly brings joy and self-satisfaction for each new day ahead.