This I Believe

Debbie - Malden, Massachusetts
Entered on May 15, 2007
Age Group: 18 - 30

I believe in writing my own destiny. Like many college students I am still in the process of finding out what I want to do after I finish college. There are so many choices that I will now make that might just very well affect the decisions I make later in life.

I know that I may not be the wisest person or have as much life experience as others do, but I do know that life has its ups and downs. I remember when I was growing up my mother would tell me, when something didn’t go my way, that some things weren’t destined to happen and that we had no control over them. She said it to me so many times that I also began to have that mentality and I thought that I really didn’t have any control over what destiny had in store for me. It wasn’t until my junior year of high school did I start to question whether or not I could make my own destiny. At that time I was thinking about colleges that I was interested in and studying for my SATs. My cousin, Angela, was also looking at colleges to apply to during her senior year that fall. She and I had many conversations about what we were looking for when it came to our dream school. While I agonized over what colleges I wanted to focus on, she kept telling me that destiny had it all planned out for us and all we had to do was be patient. It wasn’t unusual of her to something like that. Since we were little Angela was always been a big believer in fate or destiny and she always thought that trying to go against what is already planned for us was only going to bring heartache and pain.

Anyway, what she said really got me thinking about how I was living my life. I thought that things happened to me for a reason and they were unavoidable. It didn’t matter how hard I tried or how hard I worked to get something, if it wasn’t meant to be then that was the end of it. But when I look back at the decisions that I have made in my life, I realized they happened because I let them. There were times when I should have put more effort in a project or a job, but I didn’t because I didn’t feel motivated enough to try. And there were times when I missed on an opportunity because I thought that I wasn’t good enough. It wasn’t fate the caused all of this, it was me. I chose not to do those things and in the process I have greatly regretted those decisions. I have learned that destiny is not a path chosen for me, it is a path that is shaped by my hard work and my determination to achieve my goals.