This I Believe

Amy - Perry, Oklahoma
Entered on May 14, 2007
Age Group: Under 18
Themes: death

I believe in death. Yes, I believe in the inevitable, death. Death is that painful little word that most people despise, and no one enjoys speaking of.

I believe that everything dies, most things we don’t even notice. I believe that some people experience death more than others. I am one of those people. I have become more accustomed to the fact that death happens; I used to ignore it as if it never occurred, like many people choose to do. Now, it’s not really welcomed, but more or less expected. I know when it’s coming, I can sense it, death travels along with everyone every day; it just doesn’t always show itself. But, when it does it brings with it that bitter pang of sorrow that pinches your heart and makes you gasp for air. You know you’re not the one it took, but you sometimes wish you were. Some curse it, some envy it, but me, I expect it. Death is dependable.

I believe people perish, but also that some die a little each day. I believe that death means not living, and many people walk around dead every day. Some choose not to live, they do what is expected, and their death is their own fault because they don’t really know how to live. Some don’t have a choice, their life is not their own. Somewhere, somehow something happened, maybe it was gradual, maybe it was sudden, but it happened and now their old life is dead and they can never get it back. All of these people still have a life, but it is not what they wanted, and most choose not to live at all, but to go through the motions pretending that they’re alive. They know inside that they have died, but they don’t know how to fix it. They can’t get help because no one can tell from the outside that they are dead. They are alone, stuck in the lifelessness inside of themselves, praying for help.

I believe in death. I believe in it so much that I expect it day after day. I grow accustomed to it not being there, then it comes and devastates my empty life, and I feel more lifeless than ever before. Yet, through all of this darkness it is only death and I believe that when it comes for me, I will, in death, finally have life.