This I Believe

Funda - Youngstown, Ohio
Entered on May 3, 2007
Age Group: 18 - 30

“I believe I owe my life to the little things”

On September 23, 2003, I sat on the couch speaking to my cousin; whom which I have not spoken to in years. She just decided to stop by and catch up on a few things. Now, you might say that’s pretty normal, but to me it was the conversation that saved my life.

This all began in March 2003, when I met the man of my dreams; unfortunately he made money the illegal way. As I sit back and think about the “little” series of events that had happened during that time. The thefts, the robberies, the shootings and we even had to hide away in a hotel just to have peace of mind. This relationship only lasted for six months and for two of those months he was in jail and it just went down hill from there. I knew it wasn’t right to live this way, but I loved him and was willing to do anything for him. During that six month time frame is was like living in fear for most of the time, always looking over your shoulder. The most fearful feeling was not knowing who you can trust both friends and family. We manage to stay out the way by staying in hotels or over “my” family’s house. But through it all we managed to make each other happy and that was all that really mattered.

The little things I believe I owe my life is the conversation held with my cousin, because routinely when I got of off work, I got dressed and he would come pick me up and we would spend the rest of the day together. But the conversation held me back from calling him right away and we actually spoke for about 3 hours. According to police and the word on the street in between 11:00pm – 1:00am he was kidnapped, put in the trunk of his car and was ridden around all day. I spoke to him last around 11:15pm on the phone; I still doubt if it was really him. His body was found in the trunk of his burning car, hands and feet tied. He was shoot execution style in the back of his head.

I received the phone call from hell at 4:27am and the caller, which was my cousin asked was he with me and at that moment my heart dropped; my body froze and I couldn’t do nothing but cry. The feeling of hurt and loneliness and knowing I was never going to see him again just killed me inside to the point of vomiting all over the place.

I always think back to that conversation and wondered if I would have called him as soon as I got off, maybe this wouldn’t have happened. And I always questioned it and the one night I asked the Lord why, and he told me if I was with him on that day I would have been killed myself. So, I do believe I owe my life to the conversation on that day and since that day I never regret nor do I look back on the little things that happen in life, because they happen for a reason.