Hurtful Words

Kayla - Schenectady, New York
Entered on April 18, 2007
Age Group: Under 18

I believe that hurtful words imprint themselves on our bodies and in our hearts in such a way that they can and will stay with us forever. It can affect the way they run their lives or the way they look at the person who made the comment, without them even realizing it. I have had a similar experience to the one I am describing now. Five years ago my Papa C past away from cancer. He had had cancer for a while, but his death still took a huge toll on my family and on me. Every year my Papa C and I would have a Kayla day, one in which I could pick anything to do and we would do it, no matter how crazy or out of the question it was. It would just be my Papa C and I, together for a whole day. When he passed away, I didn’t really know how to react. I had never lost someone so close to me before, nor had I ever lost any family member. I am different when it comes to mourning, I don’t typically like to cry in front of my family or other people and I am very reserved. The day that my Papa C died, my mom told me he had passed and tried to hug me, but I did not want to be touched. After I had shrugged away from my mother, she actually said to me “It’s like you don’t even care that your grandfather just died.” My mother actually had the nerve to say that to me, and talking about it now only gets me even more upset, even though it’s five years later. It has hurt my mother and mine’s relationship, because I will never forget those hurtful words she said to me. What she said hurt me in no other way words have hurt me before, and she did not understand. What hurt most about what she said was that she is my mother, and still doesn’t know how I tick. She didn’t understand that when something bad happens to me I don’t like to express my feelings, at least not right away. I would much rather just be by myself. She just didn’t get it. Instead she expressed her frustration with my close-mindedness by an insult that went to my deep inner core. I loved my Papa C more than I could even imagine, and I believe that the things people say to one another can affect them in more ways than you could ever imagine, and I believe we should all take into close consideration what criticism you give someone and what you should probably keep to yourself, because it could hurt your relationship a lot in the long run, and the person will never forget what you said to them.